Looking forward to another Positive Birth

In preparation for my 2^nd birth, I have been looking over all my antenatal notes from my 1^st pregnancy. We did a weekend antenatal course with Cuidiu (Irish Childbirth Trust). This was an amazing eye-opener for me and my hubby. I learnt that my body was designed to give birth, my body could make the natural pain reliever (endorphins) as required, assuming I control my fears and panic- these natural endorphins would be able to be released. We learnt that this was our birth- no one else’s- definitely not the hospitals. So armed with the knowledge of the natural process of birth, as well as the hospital processes, we could make educated decisions during the labour. And most importantly feel that we owned the experience.

I would highly recommend doing some antenatal study outside of the hospital offered courses. The hospitals obviously explain all about their process and approaches, which may or may not be exactly what you want.

I also did a home study course on GentleBirthing. This is a hypnobirthing program developed by an Irish woman, Tracy Donegan. The idea behind it, as with the Marie Mongan Method of HypnoBirthing, is to remove the fear many women associate with birth, and replace it with positive images. I am practicing this again, and am finding I can reach the state of deep relaxation very quickly, and also my little one loves it. I find it a great way to connect with the little one, the minute I begin the deep breathing the little one starts to move around loads. He/she obviously feels I am relaxed and can communicate with me.

I am also reading a lot. I have been reading Ina May Gaskin’s Guide to Child Birthing and have found it brilliant. I recommend it for anyone interested in a natural or “normal” birth. (Just on a side note- we are very lucky to have Ina May visiting Ireland for the Homebirth Annual Conference, 29^th April, see www.homebirth.ie.)

Another great resource I used near the end of my first pregnancy was Journey into Mothehood by Sheri L. Menelli, a book of birth stories. I was balling crying through most. So emotional, positive, and encouraging. I downloaded this book free of charge from their website:

from Sheri's blog (http://smenelli.wordpress.com/):
"Please feel free to download this book of Journey into Motherhood and pass it on to other birth workers and expectant women.
http://www.birthingbusiness.com/Book/giveaway.html"

A bit about Fear:

The majority of women have heard the horror stories, the scary birth stories, friends’ bad experiences, TV and Movies with women screaming their heads off, cursing their partners, swearing they will never let them touch them again. It is a touchy subject as well. If you have a lovely birth, like we had with Little Man. While it was uncomfortable, yes; long, yes; painful, no. Would I have done it again straight away?? Well, if I got a little rest first, then yes. I got up from my 1 or 2 stitches and had a lovely shower, and then I carried our baba back from the delivery suite to the maternity ward. No drugs to numb me or dose the baby, we began our breastfeeding relationship happy and alert.

But when you tell people this, they make out you have rose tinted glasses on. And I feel like I am boosting, which I hate and try hard not to do. I have heard comments that by telling your positive birth story, you are belittling the women who have a tough time, but this is not it at all.

Overcoming the Fear:

I very much believe in the philosophies of GentleBirthing, and Cuidiu (Irish Childbirth Trust) and the NCT (UK’s National Childbirth Trust). That if women remove the fear (through education), and replace it with positive affirmations, a positive outlook towards birth (through education and deep relaxation in the case of hypnobirthing) then they have a big advantage towards obtaining their natural birth. Women need to stop listening or watching the horror stories surrounding birth and immerse themselves in positive stories and images.

A great idea I used (originally I came across it in Tracey Donegan’s GentleBirthing program, but have seen various types since) is to make a birth board- mine was simply an A4 page with images I felt represented how our birth would be, how our breastfeeding will go, how we will engage with our beautiful little one.

This time round I tried to add in some positive images of siblings and new babies. This is one area I am a little apprehensive of. But I am staying positive. Little Man will adore his little brother or sister as much as he does now. He kisses my belly all the time, and chats and reassures it.

What are other people’s experiences or thoughts on birth without fear/pain?

Take Notice of the Little things

On JDaniel4’s Mom blog Good Girl Gone Redneck wrote a lovely post on pausing from life for a moment, it made me well up.

So I thought I would take a few minutes to take note of the little things about my Little Man, the things we maybe take for granted, the things we need to treasure and bring to the fore of our brains for stressful/ tough days.

• How soft my little man’s skin and hair is. I read somewhere that breastfeed babies have softer skin and that this continues as long as they breastfeed (found one reference there on Dr Sears website relating to initially babies skin: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/breastfeeding/why-breast-best/3-little-known-benefits-breastfeeding  not sure where I saw longer feed baby reference). I swear LM’s skin is as soft as the day I first met him.
• Recently if I seem a little impatient, or am trying to convince him to do something he doesn’t want to do, like get into bed, he strokes my face and hair and says: “It’s ok Mama, it’s ok”. So lovingly.
• Breastfeeding- all the quite time spent looking into each others eyes. Gives me (and him I believe) a lovely calming moment. (see post on breastfeeding)
• Getting so excited and happy that his Dada is home from work that he drops everything to run and give him a hug. Making my hubby’s day. So sweet.
• Eyelashes- my Little Man has the longest eyelashes I have ever seen, they would make Rimmel mascara jealous, and he has begun to use them. Unintentionally and unknowingly to him at the moment. When he wants something, he tilts his head flutters those lashes and puts on a cute voice. It is so adorable. He is so innocently cunning. I love it.
• Unlooked for, Unasked for, Un-pleaded for hugs and kisses, just cause he wanted to give you one. It just makes my heart swell. At 2.5 he can be so affectionate and gentle.
• Kissing/ hugging his baby brother or sister- no I haven’t given birth yet, he does this through my belly. He may be on the way to climb up on my lap for a cuddle, story or a feed and he pauses mid climb to embrace my belly. Then kiss it and sometimes talks to it.
• Little man has 2 beauty spots (like largish freckles) since he was born. I have noticed another tiny freckle starting on his arm. I feel privileged that I (his mama) know that he had only 2 since birth, one on his right leg and one under his hair on the back of his neck. We call them funny spots. The idea is that when pushed it makes you laugh. Strange I know.

Travelling with Tots- activities:

@ http://www.being-a-mama.blogspot.com/

We are heading on a holiday soon, and again need ideas to entertain my Little Man (LM) on aeroplane, bus, restaurants, trains, airports…

So I have been putting my thinking cap on and here are some of the things we have successfully used previously and some new suggestions we plan to try:

• Book and toy Combo:
• As I mentioned in my recent Week1 Pinterest Challenge my LM loves all things to do with the Sea- fish (Nemo, sweet lips, swordfish), penguins, hammerhead sharks, octopuses, jelly fish, crabs, etc

Week 1 Pinterest Challenge Snow Globe Aquarium

Also this trip is slightly sea themed as we plan to visit a cool aquarium and marine park.

• So we recently purchased a little penguin Dada and baba from Schleich (a brand which we adore!!)

• And while on our date on Saturday, me and my hubby passed a new charity shop, and got a great Penguin book

100 Facts about Penguins

• So we will be combining the two into a lovely gift for LM to appear at a potential disaster an opportune moment.
• Activity Books:
• Mr Men counting- I picked this up a while ago and it has been in my goodie box (anytime I see a good deal on books/ games/ toys, I buy them and pop them into the goodie box for future use) and looks like a good activity book. LM is counting everything these days, so i think he will enjoy it.
• Lacing Game: as detailed in earlier post

• Puppets:
• We got a load of tiny finger puppets from Ikea at various times, and always good for telling stories.



Ikea Puppets

• Figurines:

• We had a treasure hunt last Sunday and the “treasure” this time was a little boy, we called him Ben. Through the treasure hunt we developed a story around Ben. I also picked Ben, and his mum and dad up in sales, all €2.50, and they are goodie box occupies. So we thought we might bring his mum and dad with us and they could be waiting in the apartment.

• I-Spy Book: inspired by Pinterest Pin
• I took some photos of a mixture of LM’s toys and am planning on making a cute little I-Spy book. Still in process of doing this, post shortly.



I Spy Book from deliacreates

• CD Case game: I have yet to do this, but am planning on it- great idea!!

bkids.typepad.com

• Etch a Sketch- we bought this for €3.99 before our last trip to France and it was a success, and has been used a good bit since. Good for drawing games- Mama or Dada draw picture and LM guesses what it is. Or opposite, LM draws and we guess.
•            
• Card Games: We got 2 sets of cards- wild animals and vehicles. Both are things LM loves. They are €1.50 each and great images. So you can play traditional games of snap or memory or go fish. Or make up your own games, like make the sound of the animal or vehicle that comes up, or name the animal’s baby, lots of scope.
• Colouring: Bring a small selection of crayons (twistables would be great as no mess, no breaks) and a homemade notebook/ colouring book. I made a colouring book with images found on the net, all the cartoon type people LM knows from films/ books/ toys at the moment. Print, and bind/ staple.
• I got some great cartoon prints from http://www.coloring-book.info/coloring/
• Water Painting: found this great set- a reusable no mess paint set. The one we got was “Cars” themed, it’s great, you have a little pen that you fill up with water and use this as a marked/ paint brush. When rubbed over special paper it reveals the coloured image.
• Books (again): some of his favourites, not too many obviously, limited case room, we decided on the following:
• Katie and the Sunflowers (a recent birthday gift for Dada from LM)

Katie and the Sunflowers

• The whale and the Snail (sea theme)
• Disney book- heavy but a requirement for sleep!
• And new Apple Tree Farm Collection

I purchased a brilliant collection recently which had been put aside for this trip. Can’t wait to read it with LM, he has 2 of these books already, and about a year ago I picked up a set of figurines that we now call Poppy, Sam, Mama (Mrs. Boot) and Dada (Tom- he is really the farm hand, no dada on scene but for LM he is also called Dada- his assumption) and Dog (rusty).

Farm Set from the Early Learning Centre



Farmyard Tales

What ideas have you used to entertain your Little Ones while travelling???